Doubts

from by John Muirhead

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lyrics

My creative license
my artistic indecicisiveness
stifles me

I'm out on the street
you flick your cigarette butt into the gutter
staring at each other
we waiting for the same thing

without a word worth saying.

and all of my doubt lives
within this indecision
plenty of drive and but a pittance of the discipline
I digress, I guess I just wasn’t cut out for this

and you say that you can’t say if anyone is.
So I've decided that:

I don’t want to die hanging on to my doubts
I don’t wanna fight it when the fire goes out
I'm haunted by the quiet
of potential unrequited
and the disappointment
in my own eyes
I don't want to die.

I might need some time, might need your help
but I don’t want to die with my doubts


Been waking every day
with blank slate staring straight back at me
Let me stay
all the things I should be doing
live and die inside excuses
like "tomorrows a brand new day"

and nothing works the same
as it did back then
been pulling at the ends of
every person I’ve pretended to be
I think I like being me
I don't know what that means.

but now these songs pull me along with urgency
And they're telling me:

I don’t want to die hanging on to my doubts
I don’t wanna fight it when the fire goes out
I'm haunted by the quiet
of potential unrequited
and the disappointment
in my own eyes
I don't want to die.

And I might need some time, might need your help
You know I've had my doubts
and all these years of fighting fears
I'll get up off the ground, I'll find it in myself.

credits

from Foundational, released June 8, 2018

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John Muirhead London, Ontario

Introspective Indie-Folk from London, ON.

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